The countdown continues to the top behavior that makes parents want to scream. So far, I've covered numbers 5 through 3 on the list: Back talk , tantrums , and not listening . Coming in as the second most frustrating behavior is whining. Some parents view whining as a different voice a child uses when she is wanting something. Others mean incessant asking for whatever the child wants after they've been told no. Both types of whining can certainly grate on a parent's nerves, so let's address each one separately. Whining, in which a child uses a different voice, is actually a more mature form of crying. Scientists have found that our brains are hard-wired to respond to the sounds of a baby's cries (in fact, our emotion centers in our brains light up in about 100 milliseconds after we hear the cry), and whining is just a step up from that. It still provokes a visceral reaction that urges us to take action to make it stop. Only now we don't see a helpless baby; we are generally perceiving a child trying to manipulate us, because isn't that what we've been told for ages? You've noticed by now that I talk a lot about perception, and that's because how we perceive our children is key in how we interact with them. If we can switch from the idea of manipulation to seeing a small human trying to get needs met, then we can come to this situation in a calmer state and do a better job of teaching. Many experts recommend simply ignoring the child when he whines, but as I discussed in the tantrum article , ignoring the people we are close to does nothing positive for our relationship. So what are some concrete steps you can take when your child is whining?