Motherhood is beautiful and joyful. It’s also exhausting and monotonous. Taking care of the ever-present needs of little ones often leaves little time for taking care of our own which can leave us feeling drained, dreary, and down in the dumps. If you’re feeling a little blue, try these tips to turn that frown upside down.
1. Check your focus.
My boys are all about Star Wars lately, and when I heard Qui-Gon Jinn say, “Your focus determines your reality,” I wrote it down. This is not just Jedi wisdom. Mamas need to understand that whatever we direct our thoughts and energy toward will determine what we live each day.
Are you focusing on your child’s flaws or her strengths? Are you paying more attention to his negative behavior or are you seeing his heart? Are you thinking more about the drudgery of every day, or are you looking for miracle moments? A simple shift in focus can pull you out of that dump.
2. Start off on the right foot.
If you can rise and shine before the kids get up, good for you! That’s certainly helpful, but it isn’t necessary for a positive start to the day. Whenever and however you wake up, remember L.E.A.P. This stands for lights, exercise, air, and protein. First thing, turn on a lot of lights or open the blinds. Next, get a bit of exercise. Stretch and move around to get your blood pumping and oxygen flowing through.
Also try to get some fresh air. Step outside, look up at the sky, and take a few deep breaths. Hello world! Finally, grab a bit of protein. Your body is ready to convert that into energy for your day, so don’t skip breakfast.
3. Reframe the negatives into positives.
Give thanks for the things that irritate you! “I’m grateful for these dishes. My children have eaten.” “I’m thankful for a hectic morning. We are alive and able to move around.” “I’m grateful for this huge, ginormous Lego pile scattered all across the living room floor, one of which I just stepped on because it means childhood is happening here.”
4. Pump up the jam.
Play upbeat music first thing in the morning while you make breakfast or get dressed. Studies show music actually improves your mood and has a lot of other benefits, likes lowering stress and anxiety. For added benefit, shake your booty. One study showed that dancing improves mental health.
5. Get curious.
Curiosity is a stepping stone to mindfulness, and mindfulness improves mental health. Ask yourself questions like “what am I noticing about my feelings today?” or “I wonder what is going on inside my child to cause her to behave that way?” or “what small step can I take toward that goal?”
By being curious rather than judgmental, notice how the energy shifts. Approach life with a child-like sense of wonder. See things in a new perspective, notice things you haven’t noticed before, and ask a lot of questions.
6. Be social, but don’t just sulk together.
Some people just like to get together and complain to each other. It’s okay to vent to a trusted friend now and then, but make a habit of talking about your joys and successes. Hanging around with negative people and complaining about life isn’t going to put a smile back on your face. To chase away those blues, laugh with someone.
7. Challenge yourself.
Take a risk. Shake up the routine. Do something new. If you’re stuck in a rut, you’re not growing. Taking healthy risks and challenging yourself to step outside your comfort zone might be just the thing you need to shake the gloomy cloud.
8. Throw out the bad apples.
Go ahead and make a list of all the negative stuff in your life. Then, be proactive by picking at least one you can eliminate or change. Even though it might seem small and insignificant, getting rid of even small annoyances can greatly improve your mood and overall outlook. Whittle away at that list until it’s empty. If you can’t change it, reframe it.
We all feel blue from time to time, but if your sadness is persistent or worsening, seek professional help. There are too many colors to choose from to stay blue!