Quality family time in today’s culture conjures up images of weekends spent at Great Wolf Lodge or Disneyland because these are activities that appeal to our kids. But quality time doesn’t have to be synonymous with making our kids supremely happy. What kids really need isn’t more toys, more treats, or more entertainment. They just need our undivided attention. Quality time is simply about creating that space for family to be next to each other and focus on the same things your kids are focused on. Simply being together can be enough. Here are some ways to spend quality time with your family this holiday season.

1. Play board games. Board games are a great interactive way to spend some time together. Not only does the hint of friendly competition keep everyone on their toes, but there’s something about the cold weather that enhances the appeal of board games during the holidays. Competition and warmth aside though, what really lights up kids is seeing mom and dad engaged in the same thing they are.

2. Cook together. Part of the appeal with cooking is that it’s a grown-up activity kids get to partake in. Plus, kids are more prone to eat what they make. Susan Roberts, a pediatric occupational therapist and author of My Kids Eat Everything says kids eat horrible today because they are just being “fed.” She claims that kids ate better in the past when they helped prep the food, set the table, wash dishes, and in some cases even helped catch the food the family served. Not only is cooking together a way to spend quality time together, but it can make your kids less picky eaters.

3. Make a holiday greeting video. A video is a much more personal way to send holiday greetings to family members and friends, especially those you may not have seen in a while. And with the popularity of YouTube, creating a family holiday video can be equal parts meaningful and fun.

4. Wrap presents together.  Collaboration can turn gift-wrapping from a holiday nuisance to a holiday craft. The important precursor here is to do most of your shopping ahead of time. My kids have used pipe cleaners and googly eyes to create faces on some of the presents. Your guests will surely appreciate the added touch as well.

5. Give back. Being united by a common goal and working towards an act of service is perhaps the best way to spend quality time together. It will teach your child gratitude for material things, but also for the concept of family, while empowering your child to be agents of change in the future. Whether it’s donating your time at a shelter or collecting unused toy to donate and deliver together, finding ways to give back as a family will creating lasting memories and benefits.

6. Decorate the tree or stroll through a decorated neighborhood. Decorating the Christmas tree is one of the fondest memories I have as a kid. There’s something magical about seeing a tree light up. If your family doesn’t put up a Christmas tree, you can find an elaborately lit neighborhood street to take a stroll through, which can be just as enchanting.

7. Read a holiday story together. Reading a story together might be less interactive but it can be just as meaningful. Just being together with some milk and cookies in pajamas next to a fireplace is all your kids may need. Plus, reading together as a family can help develop a love of reading. 

8. Watch a holiday movie. There are many forms of quality time. And sometimes the best kind of quality time is when no words are required. Watching a holiday movie huddled together with a blanket and popcorn in hand might be the perfect way to gear up for winter break. 

9. Go somewhere. For parents who need more help shifting their focus from work to family time, sometimes the best way to shut it off is simply to go somewhere. Even a day trip to go hiking, star gazing, or just to learn a little more about nature will exponentially lessen the temptation to check email or get a little bit more work done.

This certainly is the case for my family. It’s no surprise that our best quality time happens on our twice-a-year ski trips. My kids didn’t always look forward to these ski trips. In fact, they hated skiing at first. But the discomfort of the cold and the challenge of learning how to ski actually helped build camaraderie. Bicker back at the cabin they did. But on the slopes, my kids were extremely encouraging of one another. Over time, they have become better at skiing, which has given them a sense of accomplishments. And the memories of snowball fights, building snowmen, and drinking hot chocolate have also become special bonding moments uniquely shared within our family.

10. Start your own holiday tradition. The great thing about traditions is that it can be whatever your family wants it to be. It can be silly, meaningful, sentimental or even useful. One of our family traditions is a Thanksgiving piñata. It gathers the kids together, makes for some good laughs, and gets rid of unwanted leftover Halloween candy.

 

Trying to find time and energy for quality family time is not easy during the hectic holiday season. But there are many ways to spend time together. The only necessary ingredient is to be present and near one another.